


kyuchul | your dad is my least favorite teacher [harry potter au]

by plincess_cho (ai_hao)



Series: Fic Requests [53]
Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, SHINee, Super Junior, f(x)
Genre: Author: Ai, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-06
Updated: 2015-06-06
Packaged: 2018-04-03 02:20:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4082965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ai_hao/pseuds/plincess_cho
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dialogue Prompt: "Your dad is my least favorite teacher."</p>
            </blockquote>





	kyuchul | your dad is my least favorite teacher [harry potter au]

Kyuhyun had had just about enough of Kim Heechul. As if he wasn't annoying enough already, the head of Slytherin house decided to further ruin Kyuhyun's fourth year at Hogwarts by making Heechul a prefect.  
  
The day Kyuhyun had arrived back at school after the summer holidays, he was striding down the corridor to the Ravenclaw common room when he heard a raspy voice from behind him call out, "Jelly legs!" Immediately, Kyuhyun felt his legs give way under him and he collapsed onto the floor. He knew who had been responsible the before he'd even hit the floor.  
  
Heechul.  
  
Kyuhyun reached into his robes to pull out his wand when the same voice stopped him. "I wouldn't do that if I were you, Cho," the voice sneered. Heechul's face entered Kyuhyun's line of vision. "It wouldn't be wise to attack a prefect."  
  
"A prefect?!" Kyuhyun sputtered. "But you can't possibly..." His voice trailed off as he noticed the emerald green badge pinned to Heechul's robes. Kyuhyun groaned loudly and lay back on the floor. He was slowly regaining the feelings in his legs but couldn't bring himself to move.  
  
This was going to be a very long year.  
  
*  
  
Over the next few months, Heechul truly lived up to his house's reputation. His hatred for Kyuhyun led him to torture him relentlessly, but his cunning reminded him to plan his attacks wisely. After Heechul used the tripping charm on him for the third time, Kyuhyun figured out his pattern. Heechul would use spells that would appear to be accidents when there were plenty of people around, but he would save his more vicious pranks for when he and Kyuhyun were alone together.  
  
Kyuhyun quickly learned to avoid walking by himself if possible. Once, when he was climbing the stairs to divination, Heechul appeared out on nowhere. With an evil grin on his face, he pointed his wand at Kyuhyun and exclaimed, "Anchovio!"  
  
Instantly, a putrid odor assaulted Kyuhyun's nose, and he realized in horror that the smell was coming from his feet. He thought he was saved when their herbology professor Lee Sungmin walked around the corner, but it was no use.  
  
"But he put a spell on me!" Kyuhyun exclaimed desperately.  
  
"Professor, it's not my fault that he has horrid hygiene habits," Heechul explained, trying to look as innocent as possible. "If anything, I as a /prefect/," he stressed these words for Kyuhyun's benefit, "would put a spell on him to help him remember to wash himself properly."  
  
Kyuhyun tried to protest but in the end, it was no use. Of course a professor would believe a 5th year prefect over him. Instead, he was forced to sit through a miserable hour of divination in Professor Kim Kibum's dark, stuffy attic while all the other students whispered and pointed.  
  
" _Kyuhyun_ ," his best friend Victoria hissed through clenched teeth. "What did you do to your feet?"  
  
"Heechul," he growled back.  
  
Another Slytherin student, Changmin, cackled loudly next to them.  
  
*  
  
"This is miserable!" Kyuhyun groaned. They were back in the Ravenclaw common room. Victoria and Minho were playing a game of wizard chess while Kyuhyun moaned about his plight. "I can't retaliate because he's a prefect who can get me into trouble without any professors around. I can't get him into trouble because he never does anything around any witnesses. And I can't do anything secretly, because he'll obviously know that I was me."  
  
"Heechul is a miserable human being," Minho commiserated. "It's too bad none of the professors have ever caught him. They're the only ones who can really get him into trouble."  
  
Victoria was contemplating her next move on the chess board when suddenly, her eyes lit up. "I've got an idea!"  
  
"You do?" Kyuhyun and Minho said at the same time.  
  
"You need to become a professor!" she replied.  
  
Kyuhyun rolled his eyes. "That's not very helpful, Vic," he replied. "I need something that I can  _actually_  do."  
  
"Listen," she insisted. "All we need is to cook up a bit of polyjuice potion to turn you into one of the professors! Then, you can ask Heechul to stay after in one of your classes and get him into trouble!"  
  
Kyuhyun considered this idea for a moment. "But which professor would I turn into?"  
  
Victoria gave him a very condescending look and when she replied, she spoke as if speaking with an kindergartener. "Which professor do you know better than any other in the school?"  
  
"Uhh..." Kyuhyun said dumbly.  
  
"Oh!" Minho exclaimed in realization. "The arithmancy professor! Your dad!"  
  
"Of course!" Kyuhyun exclaimed. "But how could I change into my dad without him realizing?"  
  
But Victoria had the answer to this as well. "We'll just have to wait until he's away."  
  
"He's going away to London for some meeting at the Ministry of Magic next month," Kyuhyun said.  
  
"Perfect. That'll give us plenty of time to brew the polyjuice potion. You still have your invisibility cloak, right?" she asked.  
  
Kyuhyun nodded.

Minho still looked skeptical. "The polyjuice potion... How are we going to get all of the ingredients? Some of them are really rare."  
  
"We'll have to  _borrow_  some of them from our potions class," Victoria said.  
  
"I'm sure Professor Kim Ryeowook won't mind," Kyuhyun replied with a sarcastic laugh.  
  
"Won't mind?" Minho repeated in disbelief. "He'll expel us!"  
  
"Not us," Kyuhyun said, patting Minho's shoulder. "You. But that's only if you get caught. Which you  _won’t_  because you'll have the invisibility cloak."  
  
It took a bit of convincing before Minho agreed to the task, but the next night found Kyuhyun pulling his invisibility cloak out of his trunk and handing it to Minho.  
  
"If I get expelled, I'm taking you with me," Minho informed him.  
  
"As long as I don't have to endure any more of Kim Heechul, I'll be fine."  
  
*  
  
Every time Kyuhyun encountered Kim Heechul in the next few weeks, he endured the older boy's taunts and hexes in silence. Once, after Heechul pulled the jelly legs jinx on him  _again_ , Kyuhyun nearly smiled when he thought of the polyjuice potion simmering in the neglected girls' lavatory on the third floor. The thought cheered in so much, in fact, that Heechul started to get suspicious.  
  
"What's the matter, Cho? You decided you  _like_  being sprawled out on the floor at my command?" Heechul sneered. "You like me dominating you, don't you?"  
  
"If the jelly legs jinx is the best you can do, you'd stand no chance in a duel," Kyuhyun replied coolly. "Your jinxes are just as limp as your--"  
  
"Scurgify!" Heechul exclaimed, pointing his wand at Kyuhyun. Immediately, bright pink soap bubbles started spilling out of Kyuhyun's mouth. Kyuhyun coughed violently, but the soap bubbles kept coming.  
  
"Wash out your mouth, Cho," Heechul snickered. "We can't have you talking like that in the presence of your elders."  
  
Somehow, Minho and Victoria managed to drag Kyuhyun to the hospital wing where Monsieur Zhou Mi was able to reverse the spell. "I'm not even going to ask what you said," he said when Kyuhyun tried to explain the situation.   
  
*  
  
The day before his father left for London, Kyuhyun walked into his office to bid his father goodbye. "How long will you be away?" he asked, trying not to sound too excited.  
  
"For two days," he replied. "I've asked Professor Kim Jongwoon to fill in for my classes while I'm gone."  
  
"Oh darn," Kyuhyun replied jokingly. "I guess we can't give up arithmancy after all."  
  
He hugged his father goodbye but not before pulling a few stray hairs from his cloak before he left. This was the most essential part of the polyjuice potion, and he had to be sure not to screw it up.  
  
*  
  
Kyuhyun, Minho, and Victoria all met in the Ravenclaw commonroom early the next morning and hid under Kyuhyun's invisibility cloak. They watched Professor Cho leave through the front doors of the castle, and once they were sure he was safely on his way to London, scurried up to the third floor bathroom to check on their potion.  
  
Once instead, they shrugged off the invisibility cloak. Kyuhyun hurriedly changed into his father's robes while Victoria stirred the polyjuice potion in the last stall. "It's ready!" she called.  
  
"So am I," Kyuhyun said, stepping out of the stall. His father, while a big wider around the middle than he was, was also a bit shorter so Kyuhyun's ankles stuck out of the bottom of his pants. He shoved a pair of glasses on his face and grimaced at the prescription.  
  
Victoria handed him the steaming potion while Minho looked on in concern. "Now you're sure you brewed it correctly?" he asked Victoria for the third time that morning.  
  
"Have I ever brewed a potion incorrectly?" she asked, raising one eyebrow.  
  
"Well... no... but..." Minho stammered.  
  
Kyuhyun took the goblet from Victoria's outstretched hands and took a deep breath. "Well, here goes." He threw it back like he was taking a shot of fire whiskey.  
  
At first, nothing happened. He was about to ask Victoria the same question Minho had, but suddenly, the world seemed to go off kilter. He felt himself shrinking downward and growing outward and watched as his skin changed from the youthful pale to a darker and older shade. The world fell into focus as his eyes grew to the proper prescription, and he felt his robes start to fit more properly.  
  
"Woahhh..." Minho and Victoria gasped.  
  
"It worked," Minho whispered in disbelief.   
  
"Yeah, it did," Kyuhyun replied. He was momentarily shocked at his voice. He even  _sounded_ like his father.  
  
"Alright, you have an hour," Victoria informed him. "Heechul will be heading to breakfast soon, so you'll have to catch him then."  
  
"Right," Kyuhyun said. He double checked his reflection in the mirror (infinitely weird) and then turned to go.  "Wish me luck!" he called to the other two.  
  
"Good luck!" they called.  
  
Kyuhyun peered out of the door, making sure the coast was clear, and then darted out into the hallway. He straightened his robes and tried to walk like his father. He hurried down the stairs to the great hall where students were streaming in for breakfast. Today, Kyuhyun did not look up at the enchanted ceiling to notice the storm gray thunderclouds gathering overhead. Instead, he marched straight to the Slytherin table and caught sight of Kim Heechul, downing a flagon of pumpkin juice.

“Mr. Kim,” he growled. “I need to see you in my office.”

Heechul looked up at Kyuhyun in alarm. Kyuhyun knew that Heechul was in his father’s arithmancy class but had no idea how he behaved. Kyuhyun assumed he behaved poorly and would always be eternally confused as to why Heechul had been made a prefect. Kyuhyun gruffly grabbed Heechul’s arm and pulled him up out of his seat, and they made their way back out of the great hall.

“Isn’t that Cho Kyuhyun’s father?” one of the other Slytherins asked.

“Yeah,” Changmin replied. “The dweeby weird Ravenclaw kid?”

Kyuhyun ignored them and marched Heechul quickly to his office on the second floor before any of the professors could spot them. He shoved Heechul into the classroom and shut the door behind him.

“Sit,” Kyuhyun demanded. Heechul obliged and stared up at him, his expression equal parts confusion and fright.

“Now,” Kyuhyun snarled. “What’s this I hear about you tormenting my son?”

An evil grin twitched at the corners of Heechul’s mouth. “Tormenting?” he asked with a laugh. “I haven’t been  _tormenting_  your son.”

“Oh really? Well he says--”

“That he needs his daddy to take care of the mean prefects for him?” Heechul interrupted. “Instead of punishing me, maybe you should teach him to watch where he’s going.”

Kyuhyun felt his anger boiling up inside of him and had to fight to stay in character. “Watch what you say about my son. Kyuhyun is--”

“An idiot,” Heechul finished for him. “He’s stupid, incompetent, clumsy, not to mention ugly, and--”

But before he could finish his sentence, Kyuhyun pointed his wand at him. A streak of orange light erupted from his wand and he watched as the smirking boy in front of him shrunk smaller and smaller until he assumed the form of a white ferret.

“Ha!” he exclaimed. “That’s what you get for attacking me!” he yelled, completely forgetting that he was supposed to be his father. Kyuhyun used his wand to levitate the ferret in the air. He laughed maniacally as he tossed the ferret up and down and up and down. “That’ll teach you to mess with me!”

At the sound of a knock on the door, Kyuhyun froze. The ferret hung in mid-air as the door slowly creaked open. 

“Professor Cho?” a voice called. A third year girl walked in and upon seeing the ferret, grew slightly alarmed. “Oh, if you’re busy I’ll...” her voice trailed off. She peered at Kyuhyun curiously.

 _Oh no!_  Kyuhyun thought to himself. His vision was growing blurry and he could feel his pants starting to shorten.  _I’m out of time!_

“Errr, hello, Luna,” he said hurriedly. “I’m a bit, uhm,” he looked at the ferret.

She let out a squeak and replied, “I’ll... come back later.” She turned on her heels and ran out the door.

Kyuhyun realized his time was growing short. He had to get back to the girls’ bathroom on the third floor before the potion wore off. He let the ferret drop onto the desk and changed it back into Kim Heechul who no longer wore a smirk across his mischievous face.

“ _Leave my son alone_ ,” he growled. “And if you tell anyone about this, I’ll make life at Hogwarts  _very unpleasant for you.”_  And with that, he quickly hurried out of the room.

It took all of his self control not to bolt up to the third floor. He took off his glasses as they grew more and more blurry, and by the time he pushed open the door to the lavatory, he looked more and more like himself.

“Well?” Victoria asked.

Kyuhyun held up a finger and dashed into the stall with his proper clothes. With one last painful spurt, he had become himself again and pulled on his robes. He emerged from the stall to Victoria and Minho’s expectant faces.

“Let’s just say, Heechul will never be bothering me again.”

*

Kyuhyun didn’t see Heechul again until the next day. It was as if Heechul was avoiding him, but when they accidentally crossed paths in the corridor, Heechul almost looked as if he was afraid of Kyuhyun. 

“Your dad is my least favorite teacher,” Heechul hissed at Kyuhyun as he passed. “If my father hears about this...” he started to say, but then remembered his promise. He glowered at Kyuhyun and stalked off in the opposite direction.

Kyuhyun turned to Victoria and Minho who were smiling widely. “Wait til  _my_  father hears about this!”


End file.
